hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize