Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
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she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
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But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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