Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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