i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Randomize
