Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
