Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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