I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
