there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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