i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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