First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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