He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
