U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
The power of my boobs compel you
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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