too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
