And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
