awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
