chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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