Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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