its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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