I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
