I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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