so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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