i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Dick very happy bro
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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