He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I love you. Go after that dick
My bed smells like the plague
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
