everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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