Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
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