there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
