I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
