its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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