Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
