and she was petting her beer can
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input