Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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