All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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