yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize