I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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