oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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