put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
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