my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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