im holly from the hills drunk
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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