He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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