what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
