we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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