Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
time to smoke my breakfast
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
