We're like a lot better than the average bears
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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