I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
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