Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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