You work out of a Hotel?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize