You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize