ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
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And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
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I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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