You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
