I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.