guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
