I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
